Saturday, December 31, 2016

The end of 2016....

~Milestones & memories for 2016!
I would like to think that this year was a pretty good year most of all. Life isn't always easy! It can be messy and can be difficult; it can be times of trying, perservering, waiting.... Life can be hard! 

But the most important thing to know, is that through all the trials and tribulations there is a heavenly Father who walks along side of us during the valleys, during the mountain tops and during the desert land! He withholds us during every second of our lifes. He has no time frame and yet he has given that to us as a gift to help us understand the seasons of life!

 Seasons come and go but there are lessons to learn from them if we choose to be open. Among the learning we have a choice. We can choose to be positive; when life knocks us down we can get up, dust ourselves off and continue the journey. Or we can choose to be negative.  I think we need to choose every day and remember that even if we do not get things right we are given opportunities at second chances. Each day is a gift of life and with it comes new beginnings.  Days turn to weeks, weeks turn to months, and eventually the months turn to a new year! 

We begin a new year tomorrow! I can't believe this year has flown by.. I usually pick a word to reflect on for the year and pick a list of goals. Goals are not resolutions. They are simply a list of ideas to help us strive to become better! As a Christian I take it a step further by trying daily to reflect Christ and His character. I don't  always do well which is why I'm so grateful for Gods mercy, grace & forgiveness!! I have to admit I didn't do well this year with my goals; which is why for 2017 I believe by word will be:


en•dur•ance (ɛnˈdʊər əns, -ˈdyʊər-) 


1. the fact or power of bearing pain, hardship, or adversity.

2. the ability to continue or last; stamina.

3. lasting quality; duration.

I may not have done well with my goals this year but I desire to continue the race that God has set before me! I will post my list of goals tomorrow but for now I will leave you with this....

May you have a wonderful New Years and may God bless you richly as we step into the new year of 


Tuesday, November 8, 2016

Proud to be an American....

"And I'm proud to be an American
Where at least I know I'm free
And I won't forget the ones who died who gave that right to me
And I'll gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today
Cause there ain't no doubt I love this land, God Bless the USA"

Today is election day!  And like most people I have wrestled with the decision of who should be our next President.

A week ago I went and watched
"Revive Us" by Kirk Cameron. He interviewed many people such as:
Ben Carson, Francis Chan, Jennifer Rothschild, and James MacDonald.  They talked about the condition of America, that she was in a critical condition,  however, there is still hope for her. We can make a stand as Christians in this nation by living out the faith we have been called to live, and by illuminating a light to those around us that dwells in the  dark. They explained how we as Americans  need to exercise our responsibilities by voting. We still live in a democracy and freedom hasn't come to us free.
A question arose;  how they could possibly vote for the lesser of two evils? Ben Carson had a great analogy; he explained that everyday we wake up and we have to make decisions based on what is right or what we feel is right rather.  The analogy is that we can get a paper cut and not like it and deal with the pain that comes from that even though that the thing is very small,  or we could just have both our legs cut off. Both are things we wouldn't choose but obviously there's a better choice.
In comparison,  we live our lives in critical condition when we choose not to except a free gift that the heavenly Father has given us. We do have free choice and free will and because of sin that entered the world in the beginning of time. We've become very critical but we have an opportunity and Hope because God died for each of us.
God sent His son to die for us while we were still sinners.  He took our sin on His shoulders and choose to pay the punishiment of our sin. He was the ultimate sacrifice.  There is Hope for us as well!
We can choose to walk with Him by confessing with our mouths that He is Lord and believe in our hearts that we are saved. Or we can walk a dark, and lonely path the leads to destruction.
Since God sacrificed His life for us we ought to sacrifice our lives for Him!
I was in critical condition but I found the Hope and peace that comes from the Lord. God is restoring me and giving me a heart for Him! A verse in the bible really scares me......
Matthew 7:22 says "Many will say to me on that day, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?'  Then I will tell them plainly, 'I never knew you.  Away from me, you evildoers"
I don't want to stand before Him and He say He didn't know Me!
So on this day, Election day, when America will get a new President; I can be uncertain of the outcome however, I serve a Father in heaven who is in control and already knows the outcome of this election!
The future is filled with uncertainties but God holds the future in the palm of His hands.....

"God sent His son, they called Him Jesus
He came to love, heal, and forgive.
He lived and died to buy my pardon,
An empty grave is there to prove my Savior lives.

Because He lives, I can face tomorrow.
Because He lives, All fear is gone.
Because I know He holds the future,
And life is worth the living just because He lives.

How sweet to hold a newborn baby,
And feel the pride and joy he gives.
But greater still the calm assurance,
This child can face uncertain days because He lives.

Because He lives, I can face tomorrow.
Because He lives, All fear is gone.
Because I know He holds the future,
And life is worth the living just because He lives.

And then one day I'll cross the river,
I'll fight life's final war with pain.
And then as death gives way to victory,
I'll see the lights of glory and I'll know He lives.

Because He lives, I can face tomorrow.
Because He lives, All fear is gone!
Because I know He holds the future
And life is worth the living just because

Tuesday, September 20, 2016

When the answer comes....

This morning as I was laying in bed thinking about an issue that I have been struggling with. I began to pray and ask God for some guidance and He layed something on my heart:
When we ask Him for advice or guidance, and receive the answer, we have a way of "humanizing" the answer.
Our minds can't fathom His wisdom and in our best efforts I believe it is what we do to help. I really do mean well so I try to overcompensate or justify the situation or issue. Thinking about it, it becomes another way of "handling it on our own" The problem is when we do this we return to our own strength which is why we fail time and time again.  When the answer comes we need to trust that is what is best for us without adding or minimizing it.  I love how He reassures me that He is working in me giving me the power & desire to do what pleases HIM!!

I Look To You

As I lay me down,
Heaven hear me now.
I'm lost without a cause
After giving it my all.
Winter storms have come
And darkened my sun.
After all that I've been through
Who on earth can I turn to?
I look to you.
I look to you.
After all my strength is gone,
In you I can be strong
I look to you.

And when melodies are gone,
In you I hear a song.
I look to you.
About to lose my breathe,
There's no more fighting left,
Sinking to rise no more,
Searching for that open door.
And every road that I've taken
Lead to my regret.
And I don't know if I'm going to make it.
Nothing to do but lift my head
I look to you.

My walls have come
Tumbling down on me
The rain is falling.
Defeat is calling.
I need you to set me free.
Take me far away from the battle.
I need you.
Shine on me.
I look to you.


Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Second chances....

Second chances.... Mike and I are proof they exist!!
Seven years ago Mike and I almost made a decision to separate. We were in a bad place in our marriage and couldn't figure out how to make things work. We walked the pain of an unraveled marriage filled with disappointments and brokenness which left me feeling lonely and depressed. I filled the void with business of various activities. I placed false expectations on Mike, disrespected him most the time, and tried to control him and everyone around me. Mike chose to deal with it with alcohol and work. We both chose to ignore the root of the problem until the problem began to drown us!

Then... we reached out for a LIFESAVER and an Anchor in the middle of the storm! 

There is no pit so deep, that God's love is not deeper still.
"He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the miry clay, And He set my feet upon a rock making my footsteps firm"
God in His goodness, grace & mercy restored our marriage and gave us a second chance! 
Mike and I have been through the deepest darkest valleys and we have experienced mountain top highs... but these experiences have truly allowed us to appreciate life together and look at it as the gift it was intended to be. We can honestly say we are each others best friend! For that I am appreciative of...
Second Chances!! 

Monday, August 29, 2016


I hate when Insecurities rears its ugly head...

It can be just an innocent conversation that gets your mind thinking over and over about the conversation..

It can be a group picture that was taken that didn't include your child..

It can be a false label about your child...

It can be your child being excluded because of conditions that are unfair....

It can be a look...

It can be a doubt...

It can be that you just don't fit into a social click that's been formed regardless of how sweet others can be....

It can be a canceled date..

It can be a feeling of the "un's" unloved, undesired, unwanted, unexcepted...

It can be a forgotten appointment...

It can be discouragement...

It can be NOTHING AT ALL....

And yet our mind is our biggest battle field, our worse enemy, our way of losing focus.  It can paralyze us with fear, prohibit our growth and bring us into a pit of despair...

Our mind can choose to live in the lie that plaques us with negative thoughts leaving us in an emotional state of feeling knocked down...

Or it can choose to battle the war by dusting ourselves off, standing back up with our eyes looking towards the maker of heaven earth which is where our help comes from. It can choose to put on the whole armor of God in preparation; for the battle isn't against flesh and blood but by the rulers or darkness!!

It can choose to say....
I refuse to feel defeated..
I refuse to feel forgotten..
I refuse to fill my void with the world..
I refused to feel lonely...
I refuse to be a people pleaser...
I refuse to feel like I must fit in every social walk of live..
I refuse to be depressed...
I refused to be angry...
I refused to feel sad for my child..
I refuse to feel INSECURE!!

We are accepted by the ONE who layed down is life for us..
HE delights over us.
He dances over us...
HE has chosen us...
HE has called us...
Most importantly HE LOVE US!!

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Though the seasons change.....

Though the music
And the songs we sing                       
We still lift our
To our loving God and King
Though the seasons
change Your love remains
Your love remains
Lord, You’ve been faithful
To plant the seed
And You will be
To always send Your rain

In the last few weeks there have been so many changes that have been taking place in my life, some good and some not so good.   But as I am working through these changes I am reminded that though the seasons changes God will lovingly hold my hand and guide me through them. It is so hard I feel like an emotional roller coaster.   I desire to lean on Him, Although the seasons change I know HIS LOVE REMAINS. I am literally taking it a day at a time. I remind myself how FAITHFUL GOD IS!! 

I am so glad I just did the bible study Breaking Free with Beth Moore. I have learned that God wants us to live an abundant life! If anything hold us back from experiencing such a life, God will work on us to alleviate the things that hold us back.  He is in the business or restoration and healing!!  These last few weeks has shown me that yes I do struggle with insecurities, fears and doubts.   I have felt so out of control, but I am reminded that I am not in control to begin with. When I'm experiencing these feelings often times than not I have "taken back" something I have placed at Christ feet.

 I am reminded of the goodness God wants His children to experience. I feel like we get so wrapped up in experiencing sorrow, pain or struggles that we forget that we can have joy in the midst of these things. WE don't need to feel guilty, that although we may not like the circumstances or the decisions of others around us that effect us, these words from Elevation "Hidden" comes to mind:

We still can trust God completely and listen to Him intently
God guides us through the shadows.

Hidden by Elevation (ft. Will Reagan)

There was One when I was Young
Who knew my heart
He knew my
He held my hand
And He led me to trust Him 
Now I am hidden, in the safety of your love
I trust Your heart, and Your intentions
Trust You completely, I'm listening intently
You'll guide me through these many shadows                     
As I grow and as I change
May I love you more deeply
I will lean upon Your grace
I will lean because Your goodness is unending

You are my vision, my reason for living
 You kindness leads me to repentance
I can't explain it, this sweet assurance
But I've never known this kind of friend
The sun, moon and stars shout your name
they give you reverence and I will do the same
With all my heart I give you glory
I want to seek you first
I want to love You more
I want to give you the honor you deserve


Thursday, August 18, 2016

We DIDN"T KNOW........

I can't imagine my life without my best friend! Today is a reminder of when we began our journey together 25 years ago. We were so young and really didn't know what would lie ahead of us.
We didn't know that our relationship would become one when we decided to make a promise to do life forever together~
We didn't know we would go on to have three beautiful children~
We didn't know we would loose two children we have never met~
We didn't know the heart aches, pains, struggles and trials we would endure and overcome~
We didn't know that at times life would be hard it would make US feel as if the earth beneath our feet would feel as if it were crumbling and that it would take every ounce of strength in it to overcome it~
We didn't know we would get the opportunity to experience the love of Christ, His forgiveness, and experience His restoration as he healed a marriage that had been unraveling for that first 13 years of a marriage~
We didn't know of the laughter, the fun, the memories that sharing life together would bring~
We didn't know the seasons of life would build character and wisdom in us as we tarried through each of them~
We didn't know the in each of those seasons would bring life and death~
We didn't know that marriage was selfless, sacrificial and worth fighting for~
We didn't know that it would be in God's perfect design he would call us to leave our family and friends and everything we knew and call us into a life of ministry~
We didn't know that we would be obedient & willing to follow Him faithfully~
We didn't know that in life no matter what the circumstances were we would BE BLESSED~
But NOW WE DO KNOW!!!  We have weathered the storm and let me tell you we are weathering another storm currently in our life. Each season of life brings with it the sun, the rain, the wind, the lightening, the thunder and even at times the tornado.
  But these things are needed to remain alive!! 
Sun gives heat, gives light, gives life, and gives energy
Rain is fresh water that we depend on for survival 
Wind makes energy, moves seeds that help environment grow, its inexhaustible
Lightening helps fertilize the soil
Thunder converts atmospheric nitrogen into nitrates
and supplies nitrogen to the plants
In comparison each of these things remind me of things we go through in life. We need a balance of each or we can get into trouble. To much sun can bring a drought.  Too much rain can cause floods. Too much wind can cause damage. Lightening and thunder are dangerous.
When we go though trials or challenges so long we start to feel exhausted, we loose focus, the winds in our life are damaging and the thunder and lightening is dangerous. We have all had things happen to where we feel as if our own wind has been knocked out of us by the storms that rage around us. Each storm ranges from length and intensity. But no matter how long you weather a storm at the end comes a promise.
The promise of the RAINBOW. 
The rainbow came after God flooded the earth.  He gave it as a symbol and to serve as a reminder that he would never flood the earth again.  
I think of that in every storm we have gone through. No matter what
WE will not drown in the circumstances we are going through because however long the storm is IT WILL END!! 
Image result for this too shall pass
God has been faithful. 
Isaiah 55:11 "It is the same with my word. I send it out, and it always produces fruit. It will accomplish all I want it to, and it will prosper everywhere I send it"
I always listen to music when I can not articulate my feelings, emotions or words. They seem to always have the words...
Seasons Change  United Pursuit (ft. Michael Ketterer)
Though the music changes
And the songs we sing
We still lift our praises to our loving God and king
Though the music changes
And the songs we sing
We still lift our praises to our loving God and king

Though the seasons change
Your love remains

Lord you’ve been faithful to plant the seeds
And you will be faithful to always send your rain
Lord you’ve been faithful to plant the seeds
And you will be faithful to always send your rain

Though the seasons change
Your love remains

When we were far apart
You came running with open arms